Friends

..... >< :D :D ^^

Met her again today, I may not show it well but I am very happy about it. :D

Didn't feel very nervous this time. :) I wanted to ask a lot of questions but so much questions, so little time. Sides, I prefer listening. To me, I feel that she is very wise. Wise as in she knows a lot of things about different topics and many life experiences on it so I like listening.

It feels nice being able to feel at peace. Its not easy. It depends on the people you be with and recently I been having a lot of inner and external conflict. Its very weary.. and I am very tired of it. So it feels nice being able to communicate and be comfortable with another person.

Someone who accepts me for who I am, who don't find me lacking. Someone who sees me for who I am and not who they wished for. You may think its easy but you have no idea how hard it is. After being in Poly, it makes me cherish my friends even more. :) I have never felt more than lucky in my life to know that they are always there for me, even if they are not by my side. But I know. Thats why I never stop thanking God and never stop feeling grateful.

She is one of the people I cherish too. But I wonder if she treats me as her friend too? Its funny. After a while of not meeting but still we can have endless topic to talk about and not be awkward with each other. :) I like it. Its hard to get that feeling, even harder since I came to Poly.

I feel like endless waves of problems Crashing into me, constantly trying to throw me off my path and blurring my sight. Trying to confuse me, trying to beat me down. It get so tough sometimes. SO TOUGH that I just want to break down, scream and cry.. But I can't. Its just not the time.

So I just swallow down all my sufferings, complaints and tears. Just grit my teeth and brave through every storm. Always telling myself, "When this is over, then I will cry" But by the time it ended, I just want to sleep away...

It feels heavy though. All the things I keep in my chest, its like black stuff spirming around. I don't like it. But its not like I can cut out my chest and let it all out. So I just deal with it.

Anyway, back to the main topic. I throughly enjoyed myself. The feeling of not being alone and being able to be with another person. Its nice. :D


Sometimes, I wished we can spend maybe more time with each other, not rushing anywhere...not rushing anything.. just sit on the grass underneath the huge blue sky. Just spend the whole day sitting and talking... about anything and everything. Or maybe just relaxing in each other's presence. I think that would be nice. :)