Time, is never enough

Human are the only ones that measure time. Do you see the animals doing it? they just know from how the sun and moon move across the day.

Humans are the only ones doing it. And everyone is forever wishing for more time. There is never enough for  them. :/

Not enough for sleep. Not enough to eat. Not enough for play. Not enough to even breathe.

I feel sad. 24 hours. Its so much time. Yet not enough for all the important things that we really need to think.

Think
When was the last time you went out with your friends or how often do you hang out?
When was the last time you ate as a family without someone using their phone or talking about work?
When was the last time you actually have no care in the world?
When was the last night you had a proper 7 hours of sleep or your proper 3 meals?
Have you been taking care of your health? Or do you think work is more important than that?
Have you been exercising?
When was the last time you felt happy?
When was the last time you made someone's day or help a stranger in need?
When was the last time you have been passing time with something else other than your laptop or phone?

I know I haven't been managing my time well. And when I looked at all these question, I even feel guilty about some. Looking at me now, forever feeling tired or stress. I never really thought about the life I want. Thinking about the future scares me. Even now, in the present, I could only take one step at a time. Just gotta keep trying!!!! Jia you, me! Jia you, everyone :)

Things about my school life....

Ever since I entered poly....what can I say?

Well..One thing for sure is that I have changed. Even if it is not that drastic.

It anything, I think I became more emo ;( So xian!!!! I hate that kind of heavy feeling that keeps becoming dead weight that drag my footing.

I become less trusting. I dislike like it A LOT. With my nature, I find it hard to trust in people already, thanks for totally ruling out every single classmate except for 1 or 2? I didn't really hear of anyone getting backstab but there can be a little drama every now and then.

Heck. I was part of it last year- had to learn the hard way that "lines exist for a reason- to protect yourself. I should have believe in myself but when you have to keep putting up walls..it becomes very tiring. Like you need to keep doing back up plan just in case someone try to do something bad to you.

Just yesterday, I walked into my group mates gossiping about me- most likely talking bad. Lets face it- they are talking bad about me. I wasn't surprised- only surprised that I didn't encounter this kind of things sooner. I mean, hey?! No one is a saint. I, myself even do this kind of thing. The whole class does it. If that person just now was absent- they, including me, would be talking bad about the person. So ya. I expected it.

Bad points about me:
I keep complaining. (True, I need to learn to stop that).
I sound whiny. =_= (Sorry that I sound that way but I can't change my voice)
I panic too easily (This one is hard, time management isn't as easy as you think it is)
I am a tad too sensitive at times (Personal reasons- well I am good at acting like I don't care)
I am bossy (I am working on this one alr, changing my tone and all)
I am slow in understanding (I can't change this, ok. I am not a com that can be upgraded. >:P)

I am trying to change. and hopefully become a better person. But when I become tired or moody, I tend to lose control. If work is going to be school life times 2......I wonder how am I going to survive this.

Reality sucks as per normal. "Ignorance is bliss, knowledge is power. Innocence once lost, you can't give it back. The best part is you never realised that you have been walking around with a blindfold, thinking you are in a wonderful dream. Till someone rip it off and show you the ugly side of reality.

Still so young and I already feel old. Grown up. Had the world always been like this? Without me knowing? Game of survival. The strongest wins. Gotta keep surviving. Sink or swim. I definitely am not willing to let go now.

Let it go

Its time.

To say goodbye to the past.

Those happy times, even sad ones.

All that is left is bittersweet memories.

Meeting you, I found reason to continue to hope.

Meeting you makes me wonder about fate, what a strange thing.

Farewell. Even if we do meet again, let just smile while we carve out own path.