Monday, April 01, 2013

Scream and RUN far far away

Can someone tell me when my holiday is coming????

Honestly?!! This is like working already, hardly any holiday except one day of the week. Portfolio. Portfolio. PORTFOLIO.

Great. Just GREAT. =_= I haven't even contacted any companies or look through the list. Great. =_=... Resume. Cover letters. I know I can kiss the holidays goodbye but hello?! Can this not be just like another school day. Tomorrow I am meeting with my lecturer-in-charge....gosh...She is known to be strict even though she is nice. I am bad with strict lecturers, I always feel like I have to walk on egg shells around them. I become very scared and jumpy around them. I am seriously trying to quit this weird habit but dang...can't help it. Truthfully, they have a very sharp tongue, too straightforward and their presence is overwhelming. 

I kinda finished my portfolio, still thinking about what to write for the "About" page and changing my "Home" Page..... I mean, the overall look is nice. But I feel frustrated with it. Maybe because the template is rather fixed and there aren't many style or designs I can do with it. Dang it. Feel like tearing everything down and redo again with something else. But that is not possible, I got to show her tomorrow. Hopefully she likes the style. But the more important should be that my future employee likes it. 

Anyway having mood swing now, I am feeling emotional now. Don't ask me why. Its my inferiority complex at work again- my mind is forever degrading me. Dang it. I am trying to change it into a positive voice...I am worth this. Hello?!!! I mean from only knowing how to sew buttons, I can sew up a whole dress, even threading the machines! I really should be more confident of myself. :P I CAN DO THIS, I AM AWESOME, SMART, CAPABLE and RELIABLE. Hear me??? So SHUT UP, you stupid demeaning inner voice. In fact, go to a volume lower than mute, you degrading thing.

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